Budapest, Hungary

Three words summed up Budapest:  baths, butt cracks and boats.

Let’s start with the baths. Budapest is known for its thermal baths (aka. heated pools) and a visit to the baths is an essential part of any travel itinerary. My trip to the thermal baths started out on a bad note when I realized, while in the locker room, that the $10 bikini I bought in Goa was falling apart. One of my “breast plates” was MIA and I didn’t think it was appropriate to walk out into the thermal baths with an exposed boob.

I decided to get reimbursed and come back later, but the unpleasant Hungarian ticket seller informed me that there are no refunds. But no worries, I could rent a swimsuit in the basement for the equivalent of $14 USD.

Five minutes later, I was sporting a hideous, floral, one-piece. .

I spent three hours at the baths. There were dozens of outdoor and indoor baths of varying warmth, and multiple saunas. I met a Turkish lawyer who approached me despite the hideous, floral, one-piece and we spent a couple of hours talking about Islam, Turkish politics, and women’s rights.

The next word is butt cracks. Some of the most unsavory people I’ve roomed with on my trip converged in my hostel in Budapest. To my immediate right in the dorm room was Butt Crack Man. BCM had an ugly bum and he had no shame in flaunting it morning, noon and night.

Above me was Smelly Snorer. He was airing all sorts of socks, boxers, pants and other putrid, soiled laundry from the railing of his bunk bed, where it dangled in my face. Not only that, but at night he emitted sounds that were reminiscent of freight trains and construction sites.

Across the room, was Pot Head from eastern Europe. From what I could tell, the only English phrases that he knew were, “OK if I smoke here?” and “You want beer from grocery store?”

I love men, but all I can say is that there were some truly despicable ones in my hostel.

The last word is boats. On May 1, I took a 90-minute boat ride down the Danube with Franz #56. On the boat, I fell in love with Budapest. What I’d seen of Budapest at that point hadn’t particularly wowed me. Butt cracks aside, it seemed a rather drab and dismal city (might not have helped that it was pissing rain for the first 48 hours that I was there).  Franz # 53 was right when he likened Budapest to a “dirty version of Vienna,” or so I thought.

 Budapest: A dirty version of Vienna?

Yeah, well…

…kind of.

But the Danube by night was stunning.

After seeing Budapest by boat, I subsequently discovered hundreds of “jewels” hidden within the city of Budapest, like this cool little bridge. I’m still trying to figure out its significance and what it’s called.

You just have to look.

Overnight, Budapest morphed into one of my favorite cities on the trip.